I’ve never shared my endometriosis story in much detail. So here it is..
I started my period at 13 and along with it my problems started. I was in and out the hospital all the time, I’ve ran millions of tests (CT,X-RAYS, PELVIC EXAMS, ULTRASOUNDS,EVEN A COLONOSCOPY) and nothing was ever found. I’ve seen multiple gynocologist and GI specialist. I’ve had multiple hospital stays-weeks at a time.
I’ve been told it was because I was underweight that’s why I had so many problems, I’ve been told it’s all in my head, I’ve been told to suck it up because it’s just a period and every female has to endure it, I’ve been told a lot of people have endometriosis it’s not that bad. I’ve been told I was a hypochondriac. I even started to question myself at one point- am I really crazy??
I went to see a new gynocologist about 6 or so months ago. She was great.. key word WAS (wait for it). My first visit with her I flat out told her I’m tired of not knowing, I’m tired of questioning my pain, I’m tired I said I want to know if it is endometriosis or if it is something else so I can address it and deal with it properly- because I had been told multiple times that it was probably endometriosis it was always PROBABLY, I wanted to know for sure. And my doctor complied she agreed that some people just want to know and that it was normal, so I scheduled a surgery and I had my laparoscopic surgery about 5 months ago. She found a ton of endometriosis, my intestines were actually adhered from endometriosis (I’ve always had trouble with gas and conpstipation, this was the reason why), she had to cut a piece of my intestine and she burned what she could of the endometriosis off but I have adhesions around/on vital organs that she could not burn off.
My pain was always localized to my right side, but through surgery I found out that I had endometriosis everywhere it wasn’t just on the right side.
I still have good days and bad days. After my surgery for 2 months it was the greatest I had felt in years, but my pain soon returned and I’m back to how it was before. I recently seen my doctor to get another depo shot, and I expressed my concerns to her, I’ve been having severe back pain and of course my stomach. She basically told me in a nut shell that she couldn’t do anymore for me like I said she WAS great until after my surgery, having a disease like this really does let you see the true colors of some “doctor.” She told me I had a few options the depo first(which I am on now), then lupron( which tricks your brain into thinking your in menopause and I can’t handle that), then another surgery- but she said she would not go back in as she already knows what’s there and I would have to go and see a specialist. She also told me my pain could be caused from a mind thing, as now I know it’s definitely there so it hurts more.. are you fucking kidding me woman? I’m just physically, emotionally, and mentally tired.
I have accepted the fact that this is something I will have to live with for the rest of my life, but it is still so hard to accept the fact that people still think I’m crazy.
Until you’ve walked in my shoes you can’t judge my pain. Don’t call me lazy until you know how hard it is for to physically get out of bed, and yet I still manage to be a full time student while mainting a 3.5 GPA. I also commute to school, it’s hard. It’s not just hard in a sense that college it hard, it’s hard in a sense that I get so drained at doing little things so this being a big thing is draining times 10! I sometimes wish the people in my life could just spend a day being me, so they could see how hard living with endometriosis really is.
And you know, I’m not saying it’s horrible. I mean it’s bad but I’m alive, I’m breathing, I have a roof over my head, and a comfy bed to sleep in at night. It’s just difficult to explain, you don’t know what I mean unless you have it..
This is my story. Eight years and counting of endometriosis pain.. but I can promise you I’ll get through it…